Let's Dance Some More

One of the videos popular on German MTV now...It's creative, catchy, and easy to understand.

While you do not need to know any German to understand, a short overview:

At 5am at a club, 3 people come up to a guy and ask him to leave. First, a female friend wanting to go for coffee, then a hot girl (with clear other intentions), and then Security.

The chorus basically says:

No, man, I don't want to go yet.

I'm want to dance some more.

Come on, dude (old man), it's not that late.

Let's dance some more

Enjoy.

Love, German Style???

We express love in many ways...and it's often the small things more than the words that really show it. 

The Texan side of me says that when a man invents a tasty way to cook tofu and then eats it with you...it must be love.

The side of me that's been in Germany a while was touched when my boyfriend returned from a work trip and brought me sausages from other regions of Germany. (Including ones stuffed with cheese) 

It must be love...in a German sort of way.

Sex in die Stadt

 From our Schnitzelbahn guest-blogger, BB:

   

IS MODESTY DEAD?

Perhaps it is only dying. Nevertheless, our European cousins have a different take on this matter which is pervasive throughout human history. Where is the line between flirtatious, provocative, art, practical, decadent? Greek and Roman baths, well, chronicles and poems suggest that maybe a little more than bathing was going on! And the Victorians? They didn’t bathe at all but some of the best bodice-rippers were written in the era. Sex appears to always have been a subject for scandalous behavior among royalty and our leaders and politicians and the chic of today have honed the art.

So a lighthearted seasonal firsthand look at modesty – (literally)

While reading on a quiet shaded bench in Munich’s English Garden beside one of the Isar’s meandering canals, a group of 20 something back packers  stopped their trek and disrobed and jumped in the water, soaped up, splashed a little and squealed a bit for the cold water and proceeded to lay out au natural in the rays. My college days were missing this experience.  But I have to say, it seemed quite normal to them, oblivious to each other‘s bodies and me and other park strollers. Ok, I enjoyed the show.

Skimpy Ladies’ fashion season. De rigueur is the short skirt or shorts topped off by a clingy stretch fabric Tee, two sizes too small over a push up pink or purple bra! Is it Britney, Miley, Lady Gaga influence? (Pardon the pun but my male American colleagues are Gaga). So is the fashion inspired by the desire to be “cool” or just cool? The biggest tip off of the American tourist are the gawkers, puberty to geezer. Europeans stroll by looking at maps, buildings and always on their cell phones.

Let’s not forget the clothes optional\nude beaches. These are not girls gone wild beaches. They are a mix of sun worshipers who mostly should be wearing clothes.  Particularly the guys and will someone explain how Speedo remains profitable?? To each his own, it’s a nice idea but thank God for mirrors.

I happened to be a guest at a world famous Spa in Baden Baden. It’s nestled in the hills deep in the Black Forest in a convenient location to the Germans, French and Swiss not known for their prudishness.  Well there were a few American rich there too. The scene is a gorgeous indoor\outdoor infinity edge pool. Incredibly elegant tropical motif inside and a stunning view outside of a seasonal color fest fringed with the first dusting of snow. I counted 32 people in chaises and a few at the pool dangling their toes. All are chatting, reading newspapers, magazines, kindles or laptops. So in walks real life Barbie herself from an adjacent massage cubicle clad in a short terry cloth robe and Sarah Jessica spikes.  She walks to a chaise, drops the robe, slips out of the heels and proceeds to wade into the pool from the infinity edge wearing nothing but a thong that would make a Brazilian blush. Newspapers fold up, magazines close, a Kindle is dropped, and a laptop closes. Interestingly it is the Americans who so act as the Europeans seemingly have no reaction. In the spirit of honesty and transparency, I closed my magazine.

Ah winter! Skiing, hot tubs, saunas and après ski.  I am with several couples in various stages of relationship at the Austrian resort, Zell am See and the plan is to meet at the hot tub after skiing. The ladies are clad in rather conservative bikinis and the men, thank God, in normal trunks. After a few beers (plastic cups) and the usual lies the suggestion is made that we do the sauna. We enter a room where a small sign reminds us that one must disrobe and there is a fresh stack of clean towels. No one but me is in any way concerned. Two ladies wrap a towel around their waist. The rest of the guys and gals just throw one over their shoulder. Uuh, except me, I’m wrapped and holding it with two hands! So I diligently tried to follow the rule about eye contact. But I peeked. My towel was sort of loosely in my lap as I wanted to look uninhibited.  Actually to my delight the showers were separate but back to the same unisex dressing room!

So on to après ski. I had to bring it up, "Are you guys comfortable with the sauna scene?" The looks I got were as if I had asked if Mother Theresa dated Hugh Hefner. One gal unleashed on me, “That’s the trouble with you Americans; you can’t separate the body and nudity from sex!”

So in the end, I’m confused, mystified. She has a point. Nude art is all over the Vatican. It’s even in American museums. Even Mary had breasts and Jesus had a penis. So what exactly is it. Is it just cultural; are we guilt ridden due to religious teaching? Do we make too much of a big deal about it? I guess I’m in the middle. I’m comfortable around handsome and pretty nudes…. As long as my clothes are on or I can control my towel!

Return of the Sitzpinkel – The Toilet Ghost

I've been away a few days...enjoying parents' visit, wrapping up the last week at work, and of course celebrating Oktoberfest (weisswurst and weissbier brunch today was visit #8 this year - a new record!)

And of course this evening's conversation again turned to the familiar topic:

Upon further investigation, we discovered this phenomenon has a name, and a deeper explanation: It’s called The Sitzpinkel, and according to my Theory of Germany # 273 “If There’s a Word For It In German, It Must Happen Regularly,” this must be more than an isolated practice.

My friend H, who has male German roommates confirms that it’s pretty common in shared or student housing to have this rule. I remember the average level of cleanliness of guys’ houses in college….this makes pretty good sense in those circumstances!

But we may have to attribute the uniquely German practice to the also unique and much dreaded German shelf toilet. Dreaded by tourists and those not previously instructed in its use, that is….

…I’ll just send you over to the guy who best explains it, but this design seems to have higher splash potential and maybe makes it more of a conflict source that it is elsewhere with different toilets.

Similar to the “no feet on the toilet seat” signs in Asia, you can find here “Here men must sit” signs. There are even little gadgets available to aid in training your man or son. “The Little Toilet Ghost” plays a loud warning (hear it here) when the seat is lifted, including German, English, and Dutch warnings of “Don’t you go wetting this floor, Cowboy! You never know who’s behind you, so sit down, get your water pistol in the bowl, where it belongs!”

This device claims to be the friend of the Hausfrau and the “enemy of the standing-to-pee-man” (WC Geist – Der Stehpinklerfiend)

And just so that you future visitors are not scared off – my apartment has “normal” American style toilets and men may stand...

Make yourself at home....and please sit down to pee

When studying a foreign language, culture usually is part of the curriculum.  Not only does culture make language studies interesting, but assuming the goal is to function effectively in another country, you'll want to understand all aspects of life.  Specific topics of study will differ depending on the focus of the class or the experience level of the students, but generally they are: food and drink, education, business, religion, politics, etc.

Until recently, I thought I had a fairly good grasp of German culture.  There were studies from 7th to 11th grade in high school, a semester at a German university (living with a family) and summer internship as a steel mill engineer.  After that came two years living and working in Hamburg and Berlin, and now two years in Munich.  But the Germans continue to surprise.  Ironically, at a Fourth of July picnic at a biergarten, we learned something that definitely is not taught in German class:

At home, German women make their men pee sitting down.

Honestly, I don't remember exactly the circumstances of the conversation.  At some point, a German woman was describing the experience of potty training her young boy and clearly stated that upright urination will not be taught or tolerated at home.  Logically we asked what, uh, technique her husband uses.  The answer was clear:  he sits to pee because she forbids him to stand.  Needless to say, the conversation got interesting from there.

The first response was a quest for understanding:  “Why?”.  Answer: Because relieving himself from a vertical position has a higher potential for splashing, dripping, or general messiness, and she will not allow that or clean it up.  The second response was a defense of manhood, from an American man married to a German woman:  “No red-blooded American boy of mine will pee sitting down!”  (I’m guessing that they are still discussion about this – no children yet.)

The next response came from Frau Schnitzelbahn herself, and questioned the choice of restricting freedom to prevent a problem vs. having clear consequences to address a mess when it happens:  “Why don’t you just have a household rule that if someone makes a mess, they are responsible for cleaning the entire bathroom?”  (That’s how it was in my house – you make a mess, you clean it up.)  Our German friend understood the alternative, but prefers her method.  And the men accept (acquiesce?).

The more I thought about it, the more it made sense as part of the broader culture.  Germany is a land of “kontrolling” – lots of rules, people challenging the rules, and people to enforce the rules.  It also fits with the German characteristic of preferring direct conflict (vs. America where we tend to prefer indirect conflict and subtlety).  Indeed, this will be the topics of future posts...

But is this really the case overall, or just an isolated behavior?  Time to torture the guys at work.  I can attest to the fact that they happily use urinals in the office, but they admitted that they sit to pee at home – and for the same reason, wife’s orders.  One said that his mom taught him the same thing, and he does believe that small (cannot be seen) splashes make it out of the bowl and onto the floor.  Another said that he does it as a compromise, but also thinks it makes less noise for people outside.  A third explained that since his wife cleans, he’ll do what she asks.  Culture confirmed.

It’s not the nicest topic with which to start a blog, but you don’t get lessons like this every day.  At least future topics at Schnitzelbahn have nowhere to go but… up.